Safe home from captivity in North BimBim, Lily says she's given up whale meat and sex...and found Dog. (Photo by J.M. Hilton) 

Blog hostess LuLu stars as the Beagle sisters: Jane, Lizzie, and Lydia...in a loose adaptation of Jane Airedale's classic novel of love, lust, betrayal, and misplaced bones. (Photo by J.M. Hilton) 

PRIDE & POOP by Jane Airedale, cont'd.....

Later that same evening, once Sir Bernard had allowed sleep to claim his troubled soul, Lady Britney had ridden forth in a fit of temper, and the Duchess of Avalon finally managed to drink herself under the dinner table, Her Grace's master of the hounds, John Smalls, held court in his rummy host's own library, passing 'round the best French brandy in the house, while discussing fine hounds with Spaven and Reddle, the footmen.

"I like a healthy foxhound," declared the hearty Mr. Smalls, far less taciturn than he had been upon his arrival, "and riding to the hounds is a sport fit for kings, gentlemen. To be sure -- it is. But going a-haring with a small, well-muscled beagle -- or with a merry pack of same -- Oh, that has become a much disparaged sport of late; for the ladies, it's said. But I say beagling keeps a man in touch with nature, and thus," and here he paused to pour a bit more of Sir Bernard's brandy into his tumbler, "and thus, gentlemen, I drink to that fine and noble hound -- the English beagle."

The three men raised their glasses. "To the beagle," they toasted.

"And to the duchess," added Mr. Smalls with a wink and a chuckle, "for helping to keep the sport and the breed alive."

The footmen hesitated, but finally shrugged and guzzled with all the gusto of two farm lads in an alehouse. "When I get a chance to drink me master's best brew, wot do I care to whom I raise a glass?" asked Reddle of nobody in particular.

Spavens nodded and stretched his lips in a gap-toothed grin. The two men then aided Mr. Smalls in polishing off another bottle.

(Story continued under comments. Please look for the first part of our tale in our recent archives.)

Wine connoisseur? The Sade teaches Morey and his pals a few lessons in this week's installment of Morey the Mutt. (Photo by Sarah Luttrell)