Previously on LDHD: "And now a word from our sponsor...." (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"Sushi-Siam Pet Foods announced today that they are changing the name of Two-Bark Biscuits to Two-Daddy Biscuits in honor of Gay unions." (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"Now what?"/"I thought I might get a box of Two-Daddy Biscuits to celebrate our relationship."/"But I'm a bitch!"/"Only when you don't take your medication!"(Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"I'm a bitch."/"Not when you take your medication!" (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"You're awfully quiet. What are you thinking about?"/"I was thinking I might buy a Phido Phone Booth so I won't disturb you when I make my usual myriad of cell-phone calls." (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"You don't have a cell phone."/"Damn! That @@!!%% parrot's up to his old tricks!" (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"Hello, this is achingly attractive news anchor Noah Blackstone apologizing to all you warm and wonderful canines for a deplorably slow news day. Uhm -- Did I hear a pathetic yelp?" (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"Caitie Collie just swallowed a chicken bone along with some ground glass again!" (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"That's a shame about Caitie! But the fact is, I'm younger, a lot more photogenic, and I have the smoothest WOOF in town. Gad! I actually made myself tingle all over for a moment there~" (Photo by J.M. Hilton)