"The worm turns! Crap! Did I really just say that?" (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"Flash news from LuLu's Blog! British scientists say they can create human sperm! Another news flash from flash news! Human sperm say they can create British scientists! Great pooper mitts! What will they think of next?" (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"Like there aren't enough two-leggers around already?" (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"Could this be the reason Mother warned me not to keep all my eggs in one basket?" (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"Son, I hate to tell you this, but your grandmother was a dandelion and your grandfather was a piece of dandruff." (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"You start that crap with my juice bunnies and there go your lettuce fields!" (Cartoon by A.G. Oscard)

Previously on LDHD: "Nothing is more boring than the day AFTER the Fourth of July!" (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"Isn't anybody willing to be my spiritual advisor? I can offer free political dinners, and maybe gas money...." (Photo by J.M. Hilton)

"I can still fire off my missiles! I can shatter-glass Seoul! I can take out Tokyo! I can obliterate Oahu! I CAN GET IT UP!" (Cartoon by A.G. Oscard)

"Business as usual, old son?"/"Nothing less, Kemo Sabe!" (Photo by J.M. Hilton)