Vinney the standard poodle enjoys a good joke about two coyotes and a goose who walk into a bar. (Photo by M.J. Hilton)
posted by LuLu @ 10:51 PM
LuLu's Desperate House Dogs (formerly the Bow Wow Blog)
LuLu's Desperate House Dogs is a blog about an eccentric little Beagle named LuLu, who, along with her sister Sadie (a Whippet/Terrier/Beagle blend), writes the lurid Puppies in Lust series, and absorbs local color in an idyllic, off-the-leash, canine-centered village known as Lincoln Park~
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Vinney the standard poodle enjoys a good joke about two coyotes and a goose who walk into a bar. (Photo by M.J. Hilton)
LuLu's Desperate House Dogs (formerly the Bow Wow Blog)
LuLu's Desperate House Dogs is a blog about an eccentric little Beagle named LuLu, who, along with her sister Sadie (a Whippet/Terrier/Beagle blend), writes the lurid Puppies in Lust series, and absorbs local color in an idyllic, off-the-leash, canine-centered village known as Lincoln Park~
About Me
- Name: LuLu
I am a single five-year-old female Beagle, shown here by myself, while my mix-up of a sister sings the praises of mutts on my blog. Well, let her. I have a most intriguing (one might even say lascivious) past, at least according to my autobiography. In a former lifetime I was Queen Elizabeth the Ist of England, and later on (among others) I was Nell Gwynn, Pauline Borghese, Louise Brooks, and eventually just lovable, neurotic, adorable ME. I have a perfectly charming, albeit very annoying, sister named Sadie. She's rarely plagued by conscience, possibly because she's a Sagittarius. To date she has attempted to steal most of my boyfriends, meaning we're quite used to fighting over bones. Sadie and I are the same age, although she's the adopted one. We do have a fair amount of things in common. For example, she was once Mary Queen of Scots, and later on both Barbara Villiers and Marlene Dietrich. Amazingly we get along -- at least when we're before the public~
Previous Posts
- Morey the Mutt has a werewolf for an owner and a c...
- Spencer's got a bold plan to hold onto his crown a...
- Corgi One:"If this wouldn't moider a nest of rats,...
- Corgi Two: "You're right, cariad. One minute we're...
- Meanwhile..."We made it across the border, amigo. ...
- The Story Thus Far...
- Dacia, a giant schnauzer with years of legal exper...
- King-in-waiting Spencer has been accused of cheati...
- "Spencer is the lying son of a Siamese cat!" fumed...
- A confused and tormented Lily has turned to the gh...
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38 Comments:
There's lulu, and belle, or gracie or lola. And last, but not least, there's always --- Wendy.
Shamus the possum looks like he needs a doctor!
I suppose we're never going to see Lily on your blog again?
Oh, come on, Karen -- give us a break! You probably didn't notice, but I am not currently featured on the blog, either. Yes, Lily is cute and adorable. (I'm cute and adorable too!) But we've got so many adorable dogs around here, we want to try to feature as many as possible. We also have a screwball story line that ties everything together, and Lily is a major part of that, so you will see her again.
JEESH!
The Eye On The Park:
Dacia the schnauzer today announced that all the unlicensed dogs who have been living off the land in Lincoln Park have now been adopted.
"Si," said a Chihuahua who identified himself only as 'Spunquito' -- "and tomorrow I get my license. Life eet eez good."
"You and your beeg ideas," snarled his companion. "Do you see Salma Hayek holding the end of theese leash? Do you see us eating anything but antojitos?"
A few other snarls could be heard, intermixed with cheery barking.
Dacia the schnauzer met the motley crowd wearing a "Diamond Dogs" Swarovski crystal dog collar and a pair of "Flying Ace" red Doggles from the Gilded Paw.
She reported that Spencer the spaniel's poll numbers are up as opposed to down, then stepped into her bright red Lamborghini Diablo, waved her lacquered nails, compliments of "Precious Patty's Poochie Dog Polish Collection," available at the Gilded Paw, and was off to a political dinner.
In other news, TEOTP is checking out a rumor that Spencer the spaniel is not himself these days.
"It's true," a cocker spaniel who asked not to be further identified told us. "During a walk with the Waggin' Train today, he all but ignored Lily and tried to hump a male."
"He did seem rather subdued," said a Great Dane puppy, who asked not to be identified further. "It was like he wasn't the same dog."
"He's not the same dog," Ginger, a twelve-year-old Pomeranian informed us, "and I don't give a pail of flea-dip whether you identify me or not. I think Spencer's a putz."
"I hear he tried to hump a whale," said a pretty Maltese who asked that her name be printed. Well, okay, Chole.
(Developing........)
Did anyone see Lulu and Rockie in the park tonight? There's news! Those dogs are so crazy about each other, other canines need not apply. They should get married.
Should he adopt lulu's puppy?
Yes, lulu's in love.
Hi Karen, its me Lily. Don't worry, I like being on the blog too much> I won't let Lulu keep me off for long. I saw her nessage to you, isn't she a smarty-pants?
The puppy story can't be true!
Eye, don't you mean Chloe?
Lily, my witzee pooh best friend, when have I EVER tried to keep you off the blog? Whenever a beautiful, if slightly older, heroine type is called for, your licker/kisser is always plastered right up there on LDHD. You've been on more times than Drew Barrymore has changed partners, sweetums.
As for your number one fan -- Hey, Karen, for $500 we'll send you a stuffed Lily toy. It barks, gives kisses, and gets plastic surgery.
And I mean that in JEST, Lily.
Honest~
Thank you, Fiver. The puppy story isn't true. It's all part of a nasty cat conspiracy plot, and I'm glad you're standing by me.
As for Rockie -- I'm sure he would adopt a puppy of mine if I asked him to. I mean, he's at least as thoughtful as Brad Pitt ever was, even if he doesn't have my name tattooed on his ass.
But there's no puppy to adopt!
Only two possessed cats -- and I'm currently taking bids online~
Jean,
Granted, we make more than our share of typos on this blog, but I mean Chole NOT Chloe. You read it right the first time. Chole means "gall" and the little dog's got plenty.
But if you have to explain a joke, it's not a good one. Thank you for the head's up~
Not from what we witnessed tonight. Lulu and rockie met leo and even he stared openly. They are soulmates.
They are expositionists!
Exponentially so. But photos of Spencer the new park king in his displays with Queen Lily aren't even fit for the blog. And the other day, I saw a huge hairy dog with a smaller female and he didn't even have the right end! It's a jungle out there~ poor Vinnie. Sure hope he meets someone. I'm lucky I've met my soulmate. Sony's my everything.
Interesting phraseology. The park symbolizes a gigantic earthmother and the small animals represent the primal urges of us all.
It's the Garden of Eden.
The garden of eden? I'm sure not getting any.
Well, boo hooey.
I got a new dog.,
Ken, how many dogs have you got?
Come on, Ken, count 'em. Use your toes if you have to.
Du ken live in the garden of eden?
Ken, whatever happened to Felony's puppies? And (dare I ask?) what is your new dog's name?
Duluth.
Next we'll be told that Duluth is Lulu's puppy.
I'm blaming Ken for this one.
You can't blame Ken for everything.
What happened?
Why not blame ken? He's ken.
You make a good point, S'marm.
You scared Ken away!
Nobody scares Ken away.
Ken don't scare.
Him Tonto.
Ken is a lot smarter than he sounds, or a lot dumber. Or is that possible?
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